How To Tell Your Mind, "I Can!"

Negative self-talk is a real thing. I'd bet that at some point you've talked yourself out of doing something. Whether it be taking that class; applying for a better job; eating better; starting a workout regimen, or even setting a goal. I know I have. I can think of a thousand tasks that the little voice in my head has told me, "No, You can't!"

According to the Mayo Clinic, some negative thinking (which in turn can cause negative self-talk) can be categorized into 4 main forms:

1. Personalizing: When something bad happens, you blame yourself

2. Filtering: Magnifying the negative aspects of a situation and filter out all of the positive ones.

3. Polarizing: You see things as only good or bad. There is no middle ground

4. Catastrophizing: You automatically anticipate the worse.

Some other causes of negative-talk that I can relate to are:

• Surrounding yourself with negative and unmotivated people

• Not asking for help

• Poor health habits

• Denying your self-talk experience

• Failing to practice self care

Now, here comes the good part. There are ways we can make negative-talk a distant memory. We will not be perfect, but identifying when it happens and utilizing tools I will list below, could help combat that urge.

• Follow a healthy lifestyle: Exercise affects mood, positively and reduces stress.

• Surround yourself with positive people: Sometimes that circle of friends you had for years, isn't the best fit for you today because they are negative. Negative people can make you doubt and increase stress. Even involuntarily.

• Laugh: Try to find humor in your everyday living. Humor helps alleviate stress, which in turn helps you think more positively.

• Practice positive self-talk: Don't say anything to yourself that you wouldn't say to someone else.

We are always going to have those days where we may feel, "I can't." I believe it is easier to talk yourself out of doing something then it is talking ourselves into doing something. We can switch that narrative. Take a breath, identify what the task is and what is really preventing you from doing it. Take a closer look at your surroundings. After you assess this, switch your thinking, attitude, even the company you keep, if that's what it takes. This may take a few practice try's, but the outcome is well worth it. Yes, YOU CAN!